Sunday, December 18, 2005

A long-delayed update

I guess you want/deserve an explanation of why it’s been so long since I last updated this. This entry will not be easy to write and may well be quite long, but please bear with me.
This term has been very eventful for me. Despite the fact that I have been in Reading, as I have been for the past 3 years, I have started a new job and my role has changed a lot. I am no longer a student, yet I am surrounded by students at all times. My role is now more pastoral and responsible than before, which has caused me to grow up a lot, very rapidly. I have also had to become more self-reliant and confident – something that I never dreamed possible.
This change has led me to re-evaluate everything in my life. As most of you know, I have been with James for slightly over 5 years. Various events this term have made me wonder whether our relationship is still what it had been or whether, to an extent, we had grown apart and were not ‘right for each other’ anymore. There have been a few issues between us for a while. I still care about him deeply, but I’m not sure whether that is enough and I’m not sure I’m ready to make decisions about marriage (yes, I know I’ve been a little delayed in realising this!). So, James and I are now ‘on a break’ for the time being, until March, when we will come back and see where we are. We are remaining friends throughout, however (we’re going for coffee on Tuesday). I’m still a little bewildered at the moment, but I think we are doing the right thing.
That has been the main thing that has been going on in my life and because I wasn’t sure what was going on, I didn’t have anything I could write.Now that I’ve explained that one, I may be able to post about other stuff. Some time this week (I hope), I will update about what has been happening in the Chaplaincy this term, but for now, that will have to do.

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